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3 June 2007 - Update from Laura
The ABC recently reran the film THE MAN WHO STOLE MY MOTHER'S FACE and I was particularly anxious to re-see it to gauge my own reaction to it after all this time. I wondered if I would be able to view it objectively and see past the pain to the important message the film carries, which is that rape is not a woman’s fault; that she has no need to feel either guilty or ashamed about something that another person has done any more than she should feel guilty or ashamed if she had been burgled; and most of all that things will only change if woman speak up.
So it was with great eagerness and in trepidation that I sat down to watch it. From the opening Chopin to the African war dances, I was swept along. This was a story that so many women could have told. This was the treatment metered out to countless rape victims. This was the lack of understanding of what this experience means to a woman and of how she is supposed to just sweep it under the carpet and 'get on with her life'.
This was the justice our system offers women who have been raped : that the police are so corrupt they will sell the file to line their own pockets; that a policeman should accuse a 60-year old of enticement involving a 16-year old; that your neighbours don’t know what to blame you for, except they know they have to blame you (it never seems to occur to them to blame the rapist); that in the end there is no way that legal justice can be attained – only moral justice through the airing of this film.
I am not alone or unique. This is almost an everywoman story. Those women who say they have not been raped because they would never do this, that or the other, nor would they wear this, that or the other are fooling themselves. They are either just plain lucky or they are hiding something. Every woman in every situation and in every place stands a chance of being raped through no fault of her own. Nuns and Afghan women covered in black from head to toe are raped.
And it has been going on for thousands of years!!!!! It surely is TIME now to stop it. Only by exposure can we hope to do this. People – all people – do not willingly change their behaviour unless pressure is brought to bear. We are all lazy. As long as women hide the truth about being raped, men will take advantage of the freedom that secrecy gives them. But if we expose them and demand action be taken against them, they will have to rethink their position. I am fully aware of how painful this exposure is, but it MUST be done regardless. Women have come a long way in the last century. But freedom to vote pales in insignificance in the face of freedom to NOT be violated; freedom to have sex or not to have sex with any one person, thus giving women the right to choose the father of their children and NOT have one thrust upon them. These are such basic rights and yet women do not have them.
These were the thoughts that arose in my mind from viewing this film for the second time. I no longer chafe about the errors and omissions. It is less important that my story be told correctly in every conceivable aspect than that it should be appealing and thus widely viewed. The message is more important than the messenger.
I feel I want to add my congratulations to my daughter for doing such a splendid job with such a difficult subject – not only with her personal involvement, but also in just producing a work that people want to see, thus paving the way for something to be done, even if it is just a change in attitude. Eventually, I feel sure we will get there and women will walk freely in this world – perhaps for the first time. If this film has helped to bring that about in the smallest way, I feel humbled and honoured and exuberant.
15 May 2007 - Update from Laura
The film my daughter, Cathy, made THE MAN WHO STOLE MY MOTHER'S FACE was screened in INDIA on Mothers' Day. It was accepted for the film festival in New Delhi as part of the gender and sexuality festival. This is the 18th country in which this film has been shown and it is its 27th film festival. It has won best documentary awards at Tribeca and Lexus IF awards, won the audience choice award in the U.K and been a finalist in five other festivals. Now India. The film crusades for me to get the message across that rape is not a woman's fault and things will only change if women speak up.
Laura
24 April 2007 - South East Asia premier with screening at Festival on Gender and Sexuality
THE MAN WHO STOLE MY MOTHER’S FACE is being screened on Sunday 13 May 2007 as part of the Festival on Gender and Sexuality, organised by the Public Service Broadcasting Trust in India. This will be the South East Asia premier of the film. Find out more about the festival at http://www.psbt.org/ifgs.htm
22 June 2006 - Opening of Laura Henkel House in Liberia
We have some interesting news from Liberia in West Africa. Last year, we were
contacted by a Liberian organisation working to eliminate violence against women.
They had heard about the film THE MAN WHO STOLE MY MOTHER'S FACE and wanted
to screen it at their film festival. Last week, we received an email from the
Liberia Crisis Centre for Abused Women and Children who plan to open a new shelter
for women and children who have suffered rape and domestic violence. The letter
requested Laura's permission to name the shelter after her. The House
of Laura Henkel was opened on Friday 9 June as a place where women and children
will find healing and hope to recover. See
attached media story.
The shelter in Monrovia is expected to assist over 1,000 women
and children each year who have suffered some form of sexual violence. The shelter
will provide a safe space, a 24 hour crisis phone line, counselling, court and
legal services and assistance with reporting to police. Three names were proposed
for the shelter, and Laura's name was selected because of her inspiring personal
story described in the film THE MAN WHO STOLE MY MOTHER'S FACE. The film will
be screened at the centre during their 16 days of activism campaign for eliminating
violence against women and children from 25 November to 10 December 2006.

21 November 2005 - Laura's transformation
Laura
doesn't have much free time these days. Her new life is colourful, busy,
full of creativity and joy, and amazingly active for a 76 year old. Daughter
Cathy Henkel caught up with her for coffee yesterday to find out how she continues
to transform her life.
"This year has been extraordinary for me. In January I was not well. My
mind was active and I was becoming more and more creative but my body was not
keeping up. I was so unfit I couldn't walk any distance without having
to sit down. Just getting up the three stairs in my flat was an effort. I was
tired all the time so I didn't do much, and I was still sleeping in late.
My doctor warned me that I was at high risk of developing diabetes and my eye
sight was at risk as a result. That was the piece of information that galvanised
me into action. If I was unable to read, life wouldn't be worth living.
So I went home, pulled out my scales and made a pact with myself that I would
loose weight. I had the motivation and everything flowed from that.
"It is now November and I have lost 25kg (or 55lb or 4 stone) and my weight
loss continues. I walk at least half an hour every day, rain or shine. I've
explored my neighbourhood and found all the nooks and crannies and all the barking
dogs. I play tennis once a week and in between hit the ball against the wall
to improve my game. I play table tennis as well and can run up the front stairs.
I wake up at 6am and get up at 7am every day and I'm usually in bed by
10pm. Those who knew me before as the defiant night owl will appreciate how
massive a change this is. When I was depressed I used to often sleep beyond
midday and would be awake until 3 or 4am, sometimes even all night.
"I continue to regularly attend classes at U3A. This year I convened a
class myself on the history of the middle ages which I called 'The Da Vinci
Code'. I've also attended classes in history, philosophy, poetry, Shakespeare,
memory, how the brain works and table tennis and am a regular at our weekly
forums. I'm a member of the Federation of Australian Writers and have
been published in the U3A writing class booklets and the local papers. Several
of my poems and writings are included in a new Anthology called 'The Reclaiming
the Night Anthology' to be released next month.
"My
doctor is staggered at my transformation. I am fit and well and disgustingly
healthy. My blood sugar is so low, I stand no chance of getting diabetes or
losing my sight. If I loose another 10 kg, which I intend to, I further reduce
my chances of ever having another thrombosis, and will be able to stop the blood
thinning medication. I am thoroughly enjoying my life and the challenges before
me. I love the challenge of losing weight and intend to keep going. My general
mood is one of joy, vitality and 'joie de vivre'. I have fallen in and out of
love twice and I like the effect it has on me. My home life is ordered and tidy,
my office is organised and I feel productive, curious, highly motivated and
fulfilled. I keep a diary and write regularly. I am acting on my natural curiosity
and making my dreams happen. I have completely transformed my life and I am
looking about and thinking 'what's next?'"
17 November 2005 - Laura is published
Laura has achieved one of her lifetime goals: getting published. A number
of her poems and reflections on surviving sexual assault have been included
in a new anthology entitled "The Reclaiming Anthology: healing our wounds"
compiled and edited by Melina Magdalena and printed by Seaview Press.
Melina writes in her introduction to the Anthology:
"In this anthology, each piece stands alone, representing the voices and
experiences of a diverse range of human beings, each with their own perspectives
on their experiences. None of us claim to speak for anyone but ourselves. Yet
as a volume of work, our collected voices are far more powerful than any one
voice can possibly be. I hope that the treasures within these pages will be
of benefit to those who wrote them and now get to see their published work.
I hope that the words bring comfort, strength and healing to others who read
them and recognise aspects of themselves and their own experiences within the
writings."
The anthology will be launched in Adelaide on Saturday 3 December
(2pm - 5.30pm) at the Parks Community Centre, Cowan Street, Angle Park, South
Australia. The launch features a screening of "The Man who Stole my Mother's
Face". Entry is by gold donation.
4 November 2005 - The hat that won the Melbourne Cup
I
have watched many Melbourne Cups on TV with a great deal of indifference. Seeing
people go mad, jump up and down and hug each other has always made me question
the quality of their lives. So why was I sitting in the Lawn Stand in amongst
the crush on this first of November? Ah!
Well, it started when the new Lismore Square Shopping Centre had a promotion
and one name was drawn out of a big barrel of names to be spoilt rotten at the
Melbourne Cup. And that one name was MINE. Miraculous! Incredible! And to top
it off, November the first was my 75"' birthday. Melbourne Cup had not
fallen on the first of November for eleven years, but the year it did, I won
the trip as an extraordinary birthday gift.
So here I was, feeling good under my $100 hat, having been transported by plane
and coach, accommodated, well slept, well fed (actually rather overfed), well
oiled (far too much champagne), and thoroughly spoilt and pampered. It was hot
and the sun beat down on the uncovered stand. Every seat sported either an interesting
hat or a smart dark suit. And there right in front of us was the finishing post.
I was being true to my sex, so I bet on a mare - one that was aiming for a record:
three Melbourne Cup wins in a row (a hat trick), with the impossible name of
Mak-I-how's-your-father. I'll have to rehearse it to get it right.
But what an anticlimax - after all that fuss of parading the horses, the fanfares
and the hush as we waited for those magic words: "They're off!" -
our special contender was lost amongst the tangle at the back. Oh well! I began
studying the well-groomed and well¬behaved crowd. There were some interesting
topknots that passed for hats.
As the horses approached the last bend, the crowd began to mutter.
Like the Pied Piper revisited:
And the muttering grew to a mumbling;
And the mumbling grew to a mighty rumbling;
And down the track the mare came tumbling.
She's moving out ... she's moving up ... she's passing them ... she's near
the front ... she's running first. She's won! She's won!
The roar was deafening, the commentator drowned out and forgotten. People were
screaming with delight and hugging and kissing each other. The atmosphere was
infectious. I hugged the stranger next to me. For a full ten minutes everyone
was everyone else's friend. Slowly, slowly, the crowd began to sit down and
catch its breath. It was a bookie's nightmare. Practically everyone in that
stand had bet on Makybe Diva. She couldn't have run a race more designed to
make her a legend. If she had led all the way, it wouldn't have been so exhilarating.
I collected my winnings: $100. How appropriate! It pays for my extravagant
hat that I will probably never wear again. I think I'll put an advert in the
paper
Free Hat for Hire
Has Witnessed an Unforgettable Performance
27 October 2005 - Lucky Laura a big winner
(Originally
published in Northern Rivers Echo. Reprinted with permission.)
Goonellabah resident Laura Henkel is off to the Melbourne Cup in grand style
thanks to Lismore Shopping Square.
Laura Henkel will celebrate her 75th birthday next Tuesday, November 1, and
she couldn't have asked for a better birthday present than a free trip to the
race that stops a nation.
The Goonellabah resident is off to the Melbourne Cup with her friend Lynda
Bell after winning a Lismore Shopping Square promotion that includes grandstand
tickets to the race, airfares, accommodation and a trackside picnic.
Laura says the Melbourne Cup falling on her 75th birthday makes it all the more
special and she fully intends to take her good fortune with her all the way
to Flemington.
"When they phoned me to say that I had won I just couldn't believe it
and I thought it was a joke - when I realised that it wasn't I was on cloud
nine and I still am," Laura said. "To get in the spirit I bought a
brand new outfit and a hat. I'm definitely going to have a bet on Makybe Diva
if she's in the race because I would just love to see her win for the third
consecutive time."
Postscript: Laura had a brilliant time in Melbourne and she backed the winner,
Makybe Diva, winning a little extra pocket money.
24 October 2005 - Sundance Channel broadcast
The Man Who Stole My Mother's Face will be broadcast for the first time in
the United States on the Sundance Channel on 24 October 2005.
19 May 2005 - Update by Laura Henkel: teaching and loving life
Laura writes:
News of the latest audience award for THE MAN WHO STOLE MY MOTHER'S FACE and
the intimation that it is being shown in such places as Prague, Czechoslovakia
and is currently touring the UK, turned my thoughts inward to take stock of
what is happening to me at present. And I find myself filled with excitement
and brimming over with enthusiasm.
Joining U3A has been a real bonus and the acquisition of a computer has radically
and drastically changed my life. The internet has thoroughly amazed me and I
find Google extraordinary and mind-boggling.
Then just when I thought everything was going so well and life could not be
better, I volunteered to be a convener (I shy away from the term: tutor) for
a group discussion, roughly based on the controversial book The Da Vinci Code.
I've never done this sort of thing before. My only teaching experience
has been one-on-one teaching music and the piano and a two-year once-a-week
stint during my last years at school teaching grown, African men to read and
write during the Apartheidt years.
But this was different and frankly I was terrified, although I tried hard
not to show it. One of the U3A tutors coached me and gave me some valuable tips,
but she was off overseas almost as soon as the term began and I was on my own,
not even knowing what size class would confront me at that first meeting.
So do I regret the whole business and want to curl up in a fetal position?
No. No. No. The experience has been a high point of my existence. I have felt
so appreciated and validated and I am thoroughly enjoying myself. If the members
of my class are enjoying themselves only half as much as I am, then who could
ask for more?
Others may know this, but I have discovered for myself that leading a class
is giving me far more than I could ever get from attending some one else's
class. What is it that I am getting? A feeling that people are interested in
what I have to say (not put down as my past experience has been) and that I
have a value to others and that I can still make a contribution to society and
my fellow human beings.
When I remember that on arrival in Australia so soon after that vicious attack
on me, feeling very suicidal, useless and totally unvalued and unvalidated and
that this feeling persisted for nearly ten years, I know I am enormously indebted
to the U3A and more recently to becoming a convener.
Things have changed in my life. I have decided seriously to lose weight and
in the past four months have lost 15 kilos, which is 33 lbs. I regularly walk
round the estate (oh, those hills!) and have spring-cleaned my flat, clearing
away the surface mess of papers and books everywhere. I have a new organised
approach. My daughter would be so impressed, as she only remembers the chaotic
Laura.
If you haven't tried being a convener or a tutor, why not risk it. I
guarantee you'll surprise yourself. It may change your life too. I'm
sure that, like me, you'll have a whale of a time.
Laura
20 April 2005 - THE MAN WHO STOLE MY MOTHER'S FACE plays at OneWorld05
OneWorld, the 7th Annual Human Rights Documentary Film Festival, takes place
in Prague, Czech Republic, from 27 April to 5 May 2005.
Organised by People in Need - Czech TV Foundation, One World has quickly emerged
as one of the largest and most important human rights film festivals in Europe
and is firmly established as one of Prague's premier cultural and media events.
One World is unique because it is not only interested in introducing new and
inspirational films, but is also a festival dedicated to freedom, justice, and
human dignity.
One World 2005 will present 120 films and videos from all around the world,
chosen from among 850 entries. Screenings will be followed by debates with festival
guests, representatives of non-governmental organizations, journalists, academics
and experts on given themes.
The festival center will be located in the Minor Theatre. Other screenings
will be held in popular movie theaters throughout Prague.
The full programme and additional information about screenings and venues for
One World 2005 are available at www.oneworld.cz.
6 April 2005 - THE MAN WHO STOLE MY MOTHER'S FACE wins audience award in UK
The London Australian Film Festival is an eagerly awaited annual
landmark on the UK film calendar. The 11th annual festival kicked off at London's
Barbican in March and THE MAN WHO STOLE MY MOTHER'S FACE won the audience poll
award for Best Documentary with a score of 4.9 out of 5.
7 March 2005 - Director Cathy Henkel to speak at fundraising event
Unite & Inspire in cooperation with the South Eastern Centre for Sexual
Assault (SE CASA) have organised Breaking the Silence, a formal sit-down, fundraising
dinner open to the general public on 22 April 2004. Director Cathy Henkel will
speak at this event.
The organisers aim to:
- Raise funds from ticket sales and donations for Feeling Safe Together,
a protective education program for primary-school children
- Raise the profile of sexual assault issues in our community.
The night will be held at Leonda by the Yarra and will comprise a two course
dinner with wine, beer and non alcoholic drinks provided.
The presentations aim to inspire other survivors to overcome feelings of violation
and humiliation, in an attempt to regain a sense of selfconfidence. It will
also provide guests with an insight into this social epidemic. The event aims
to assist, both financially and psychologically, the present and future survivors
of sexual assault.
Download the Breaking the Silence information kit as a PDF.
9 August 2004 - Web site launch
LET'S FACE IT, the web site to accompany the documentary, THE
MAN WHO STOLE MY MOTHER'S FACE, was officially launched in cyberspace on Monday
9 August 2004.
Screenings
Television broadcasts
Australian Broadcasting Corporation - Wednesday 18 August 2004
Sundance Channel in the US on 24 October 2005
Festivals and theatrical releases
International Human Rights Conference, Byron Bay – July
2003
Cape Town World Cinema Festival (finalist: best documentary) – Nov 2003
Hot Docs, Canadian International Film Festival – April 2004
Tribeca Film Festival (co-winner: best feature documentary) – May 2004
Byron Film Club, Byron Lounge Cinema – July 2003
Melbourne Film Festival – July 2004
Federal Film Festival – July 2004
Brisbane Film Festival – August 2004
Popcorn Taxi (Sydney)- August 2004
International Film Festival, Israel – September 2004
Apollo Film Festival, South Africa – September 2004
Nordisk Panorama Short & Documentary Film festival, Rejavik, Iceland –
September 04
Köln Film Festival, Germany – October 2004
“Stranger than Fiction”- Irish Film Institute Festival – 2nd
October 2004
31st Flanders Film Festival, Gent, Belgium – October 2004
Human Rights Film Festival, Liberia – November 2004
Festival of Women's Movies, Netherlands – Nov 2004
Seattle Film Festival – December 2004
London Australian Film Festival – March 2005 (winner: audience choice
award)
London Australia Film Festival tour of UK – April to June 2005
One World Film Festival, Czech Republic- April 2005
Tel Aviv International Documentary Film Festival – April 2005
British Film Institute touring program: Mama Africa – July to November
2005
Belmont World Film, Boston - 23 October 2005
Sundance Channel broadcast - 24 October 2005
One World Film Festival, Berlin - November 2005
Find out more... Audience responses
Awards & reviews
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